(Written for the_safehouse Livejournal community random quote challenge. Quote: " While we're on the subject of rules, what about rule 46, section 3, no unnecessary talking?." (Earth, Air, Fire and Custard, Tom Holt))

Bodie sighed loudly as he slung one leg over the arm of his chair and wriggled deeper into the cushions, covering his eyes with one folded arm as he tried - unsuccessfully - to ignore Doyle's voice. It was a cold, wet and miserable day, and they'd decided to spend it at his place and watch the afternoon match on telly; Ray had also, for some unbeknownst reason, decided that it was time they re-read the departmental rule book and was steadily working his way through it, delivering a running commentary on the items he had issues with.

There were a lot of those.

Bodie squinted across at his partner lying full-length on the settee, ankles crossed and feet propped up on one arm, and let his eyes wander over the lean frame until they finally settled on the sharp profile with its full, sensual mouth.

What's it going to take to shut you up, Goldilocks, he thought sourly -- and then, as Ray burst out laughing, he suddenly thought of something that would surely do it... and warm them both up into the bargain. A wicked smile began to twitch at his lips as he shifted restlessly in anticipation. One more chance, Raymond...

"Listen to this, Bodie -- 'Rule 40: Agents will not, repeat not, instigate any kind of altercation or brawl with members of the public at any time unless said individuals are identified as suspects relating to a case in progress. If self-preservation requires you to defend yourself against obstreperous but otherwise innocent civilians, you will do so with the minimum force necessary to ensure your personal safety, and immediately arrest and deliver your assailant to a local Police Station. No excuses will be accepted.' See?" He looked over at Bodie with both eyebrows raised. "I told you shouldn't have thumped that narky little toerag yesterday, mate."

"He was trying to break into my car," Bodie pointed out reasonably, swinging his leg down and sitting upright, trying not to smirk with satisfaction as Ray unwittingly took that one more chance... "If he'd just run away like any normal, self-respecting crim instead of coming at me with a knife, I wouldn't have hit him. And anyway, I didn't hit him hard."

"Hard enough," was the lofty response, "you bloodied his nose."

"Tough," Bodie shrugged. "He scratched my paintwork. I let him go, didn't I? He should've thanked me for not nicking him, according to what you just said."

"No excuses, remember? Hey, here's another one -- 'Rule 45: On no account --'" Bodie groaned and stood up, managing to keep his face straight as he took the half-dozen steps necessary to put him at the end of the settee so he could glare down into his partner's laughing face.

"Give it a rest, Ray, f'God's sake. The rules aren't going to go away, and Cowley'll tell us fast enough if we break one."

"Yeah, I know, but listen, Rule 45 says --" Bodie abruptly bent low and pressed his fingers firmly against the full lips, stopping him short; green eyes widened in surprise, pupils dilating hugely as Ray suddenly realised just how vulnerable he was, and Bodie smiled in sheer devilment.

"Sod Rule 45," he murmured, tracing the perfect curve of Ray's upper lip suggestively before gently clasping the base of his throat, feeling the pulse leap crazily. "What about Rule 46, Section 3?"

Ray swallowed convulsively, lips parting expectantly as Bodie moved even closer, and managed to husk out,

"What about it?"

"It says 'No unnecessary talking'," whispered Bodie, watching his lover's green eyes turn clear and bright as he leaned in and kissed him deeply, growling in satisfaction when he took a firm grip of his shoulders to pull him down on top of him; they settled against each other easily, legs tangling together, and blessed silence reigned unopposed for the first time all day.

Neither of them noticed when the forgotten rulebook hit the floor.

-- THE END --

August 2005