The Other Perspective


It was a stupid way to die. I admit that. But what was I supposed to do? I mean, here's this screaming maniac waving a .44 Magnum right at Bodie. Yeah, maybe he wouldn't have fired if I hadn't moved, but Christ, I wasn't about to risk that, was I?

It was odd. The blast knocked me back into Bodie, I felt that. I could also feel him holding me up with one arm while firing, all eight shots, with the other. Then I wasn't in his grasp but standing beside him, watching.

He dropped his gun, something he'd never done, grabbed me...the body, my body in both arms and lowered it to the ground. He had yelled at me as the shot sounded, now he was shouting my name over and over, growing gradually softer. There was blood everywhere, on me, on him, running to the street.

There hadn't been any pain, it had been quick. I was feeling, I dunno exactly, a little sad, mostly disappointed. I looked around at the dirty London alley where two men had just died No soft, warm, white light calling me home, no heavenly choirs, no lost family. Just Bodie.

I heard it then and the sound ripped through me. Bodie was crying. Not hard sobs, mind you, just little harsh whispers of breath. I knelt next to him, wanting desperately to offer some kind of comfort, knowing it was beyond me.

That's when I got my second shock of the night, well, third if you count dying. Bodie leaned over me, the body, and kissed very slowly across the eyes and lips. "I love you, Ray," he kept repeating. "I love you."

The damn, lovely moron! Two years, five months and an even number of days I'd held my tongue, hid my feelings from him because he wasn't interested in men. Now, it was obvious even without the words, wasn't it? He was in love with me. I mean, I'd cried over Sid Parker, but it was completely different from the way Bodie was crying over me. The great idiot! Waits till I'm dead to tell me. If I hadn't been dead, I'd have killed him.

That's when I knew, didn't I? It was my choice. Whoever, whatever - God, the fates, I don't know - were leaving it up to me to stay or go. There may have been heavenly lights calling to me but I'd never see them. All I could see was Bodie crying.

"Can't leave him," I thought, mumbled.

That must have been all she, he it needed because I was suddenly on the wet ground wrapped in Bodie's strong arms, his tears spilling down my ruined cheekbone. Oh Christ, it hurt! It hurt so much that for a moment I regretted my decision. But I somehow got my eyes open and looked up into those wonderful blue ones of Bodie's.

"Bodie...." I don't know if there was sound to my voice or not.

"Bloody hell!" he shouted. I would have laughed if I could have. He was moving then, whipping out his R/T, calling an ambulance, kissing me in between words, still crying. He kept a tight hold on me, like he was afraid I'd leave again.

The world started to fade out. I wasn't worried. It'd made me choice. And I was looking forward to the next time I was in his arms. Next time wouldn't be because of pain and fear, it would be out of love.

-- THE END --

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