Five More Little Floozies


Hot Wire

"Move it Bodie."


"So far you've been back there all the way. It's my turn to be in the rear for a change."

"I don't think so."

"What's your bloody problem?"

"You're just not big enough Ray."


"Don't look at me that way. You know it's the bloody truth."

"Look here you fucking priapis--"

"You always result to insults when you know I'm right."

"You're not right! I'm just as hard as you and--"

"True, but you've got to face it, that you're not as big as me and you'll never keep it up."

"Well if you scooted down more, I could wrap my arms around you easier and--"

"No. I'm not getting bloody leg cramps for you."

"Should have got one with a bigger cushion."

"Beggars can't be choosers."

"Bloody right, mate. But next time you hot wire a motorbike make sure you get one big enough that I don't have to ride between you and the handlebars."


"I'm not an extrovert."

"Give over Ray!"

"My psyche evaluation from Ross proves it."

"Course you are. Only an extrovert would dress that way. Explain the sprayed on jeans. Explain the shirts!"

"What's wrong with my shirts?"

"Nothing's wrong with your shirts. I suppose if I were more conscientious, I might take a few minutes and explain to you how buttons work."

"And they say you're the agreeable one. At least I'm not neurotic like you."


"Well, you're a little obsessive about covering up. It's June for Christssake, and you're wearing a polo neck jumper."

"Some of us prefer to be a bit mysterious and classy. Play a little hard to get."


"Why are you kneeling Ray?"

"Experience has taught me that you're not hard to get at all."

"You've got me there Ray... yeah, right there... Hunnnnnnh."

That Velvet Touch

"Give a bloke some warning!"

"Don't turn around, don't look down!"

"What are you doing Ray?"

"Unzipping you."

"I know that."

"Stupid question then, wasn't it?"

"Why are you unzipping me?"

"Because I can't get to your cock any other way."

"Why now Ray?"

"Why not?"

"Because we're supposed to be doing surveillance work and our relief should be here in a few hours. Can't you wait until then?"

"Obviously not."

"Right. Well, let's just eat the dinner you went to get and we'll table this for later. What d'you get?"

"Didn't buy food, Bodie."

"Why the hell not? I'm starving and--"

"Got distracted."

"By what?"

"Something Cowley said."

"Cowley? You're trying to stick your hands down my trousers because of something Cowley said?"

"Course not."

"Then why didn't you get--"

"There was a little shop next to the chippy. They had velvet gloves in the window."


"Had to buy a pair, Bodie."

"Course you did."

"So where were we?"

"I believe your hand was right about here."


"Did you have to use quite so much rope on them Ray, we're going to have to untie them or carry them in, gives a whole new meaning to get knotted... Why the big smile?"

"... Just the satisfaction of a job well done, mate."

"S'more to it than that. You're looking like the cat that got the bloody cream."

"Planning on doing just that later."

"That explains it then. After we get done here, back to yours?"

"Too right, Bodie!"

"I know I'm irresistible, but there's still a strange glint in your eye."

"Just thinking..."

"Thinking what exactly?"

"That there's still plenty of rope left over."


"Here, bite down on this."


"C'mon Bodie. You know you want--"


"Stop being so pathetic. You made me--"

"No, forget it, let's just do it. We've got plans."

"If you don't put it in your mouth right now we're not doing anything. You're not the only one who can be bloody stubborn."


"Now close your mouth, you know how this works."


"Christ, not that hard, you'll break it!"


"Don't talk with your mouth full."


"All right, time's up Bodie... So you're right, you're not running a temperature."

"Told you!"

"Careful, or I'll get out my rectal thermometer."

"Promises, promises!"

-- THE END --

May 2008

Circuit Archive Logo Archive Home