After the Party
Doyle fumbled to get the key in the lock, giggling as the lock kept moving away from him and he made hopeless stabs at it with the key. Bodie was half-slumped against him, laughing helplessly, which didn't help matters, and Doyle no longer knew which of them was holding the other up. But it wasn't important. He was feeling too good to care.
"Come 'ere, sunshine...I'll do it...hopeless..." Bodie gurgled drunkenly in his ear, trying to reach for the key in Doyle's hand.
"No way," Doyle protested, moving his hand out of Bodie's reach, "...worse state than me, mate...be 'ere all night..."
Finally, by some miracle, he managed to turn the key in the lock and the door swung open.
They half walked, half staggered inside, still holding each other up, and made it to the sofa, falling onto it in a crumpled heap of tangled arms and legs, laughing weakly.
"Christ, that's some laugh you've got, Ray," Bodie managed, "stop, will you...can't breathe...got a stitch..." He held his side painfully and broke into another fit of giggles.
"Why're you laughing at everything you say?" Doyle asked, when he could speak, wiping the tears from his eyes, "...s'not that funny..."
Eventually they subsided into exhausted silence, apart from the occasional giggle from Doyle and hiccup from Bodie, lying unselfconsciously with their arms around round each other, Bodie's head resting heavily on Doyle's shoulder.
"Good night, that..." Bodie observed after a while.
"Yeah..." Doyle winced, raised a careful hand to his forehead. "God, Bodie...room's spinnin'...make it stop..."
"...liked your girl better than mine, though...prettier..."
"...should have said..." Doyle murmured back, closing his eyes, "...could have swapped."
"Nah..." Bodie disagreed, "no chance, mate...she was all over you. Should have gone home with her. She wanted it."
Doyle shrugged, then yawned expansively, curly head falling onto the back of the sofa. "Wasn't in the mood...too tired. How was yours?"
"OK," Bodie said noncommittally. He hiccuped again. "...Didn't like the way she kissed, though..." sounding wistful.
Doyle pushed Bodie's head to one side off his shoulder, and sat up abruptly, interested, realising as soon as he did so that he'd made a mistake when the room started to swim before his eyes. Bodie gave a moan of complaint and pulled him roughly back down again, snuggling forcibly against him. "Don't go away...feels good..."
Bodie was no seven stone weakling and Doyle was effectively trapped. Not that he objected. He was enjoying being close to Bodie too.
"Why? How did she kiss?" he asked, curious. They'd never discussed the finer points of this particular activity before and he was intrigued.
"Like this..." Bodie leaned over unselfconsciously, eyes only half open, and placed a wet, sloppy kiss on Doyle's mouth.
Doyle wasn't half as perturbed by Bodie's action as he might have been sober. "That's not so bad," he said, considering the kiss, running his tongue over his lips, savouring the faint traces of Scotch Bodie had left behind there. "Why...how did you want her to kiss?"
Bodie frowned up at him irritably through slitted dark blue eyes. "Come on, Ray...you know..." he muttered.
"No, I don't," Doyle assured him with a genteel hiccup, nudging at Bodie's cheek with his nose, encouraging him. "Come on then...show me," he challenged.
For a minute he thought Bodie might have passed out...his eyes were closed anyway...looking down he could see the thick, dark lashes framed on the pale cheeks, so he poked him none too gently in the ribs and said, "Hey, tough guy, how much you had to drink tonight? Never been more pissed than me before. Never kissed me before, either, come to think of it..."
"Should have done..." Bodie murmured, eyes opening again blearily, proving he hadn't passed out after all, "s'nice..."
"So why don't you show me then?" Doyle persisted, devilment making him continue to egg Bodie on, "...all talk and no action, mate, that's your trouble..." He rubbed his cheek against Bodie's, enjoying the rough feel of it where the dark stubble was beginning to show...so different from a woman's skin. And then the contrast further up his face where it was so soft...so much softer than any woman's skin he'd touched.
"You're a pest, Doyle...you know that?" Bodie retaliated irritably, but he pulled Doyle toward him anyway, "...like this..." mouth covering his in a definitely unsoft, unsloppy kiss. "Mmmm...just right," he sighed half to himself when it was over, "...wondered what it'd be like kissing you all the time I was kissing her...often wondered...d'you know that, Ray? Got such a gorgeous mouth...'specially this bit..." He smiled lopsidedly at Doyle, eyes creasing at the corners, fingertip tracing the outline of Doyle's upper lip.
"...tickles..." Doyle said, pressing his lips together against the sensation.
Somewhere in the back of Doyle's mind there was a growing feeling of apprehension, a warning bell telling him this was dangerous and that they shouldn't be playing this kind of game with each other. That if they carried on, in the morning, Bodie in particular was going to regret it all and be very unhappy...
What the hell...he was enjoying himself, and Bodie felt wonderful in his arms--warm and solid and heavy...Doyle lifted his head and impulsively began tugging at Bodie's jacket, trying to pull it off his shoulders. "Take it off," he ordered, "want to lie against you..."
Bodie's eyes were closed again, but he smiled sweetly at him and didn't seem to be objecting so Doyle persevered with the jacket. Somehow he managed to remove it, though he had some difficulty with his left arm when Bodie's hand got caught up in the lining. But finally Doyle flung the jacket on the floor and started pulling Bodie's shirt free of his pants, fingers fumbling with the buttons.
"What you doing?" Bodie enquired lazily, falling back on the sofa every time Doyle let go of him.
"Want to be close...want to lie against you," Doyle complained, frowning with impatience, frustrated at his inability to undo the buttons. Bodie's hand joined his, hindering more than helping, but eventually the shirt was half undone. Doyle settled for that and slid his hand inside to find the warm flesh of Bodie's chest and back, rubbing his cheek against the broad chest.
He hadn't ever been aware of wanting to do this before, but now it was happening it felt so right he knew he must have wanted it for a long time. He sighed, pressing them both back on the sofa, hand wriggling round to Bodie's back, just inside the waistband of his trousers to the smooth indentation of his bare waist, stroking. He sniffed appreciatively. Bodie smelt delicious...warm and spicy and very masculine...
Doyle pressed his nose against the cleft in the middle of Bodie's chest, then kissed him there, sliding his tongue down as far as the recalcitrant shirt would allow. Bodie gasped with pleasure.
"Naughty Ray..." he murmured languorously.
Doyle's hand started to circle Bodie's stomach through the hampering shirt, feeling the stomach muscles spasm at his touch.
"Ah...you like that..." Doyle said triumphantly, then giggled again helplessly, as one finger found and explored Bodie's belly button through the thin shirt, before the wandering hand swept back up Bodie's chest in a featherlight caress.
"Ummm..." Bodie sighed, stretching, "wicked Ray Doyle...How long have you known I wanted this...come here...gorgeous...you're gorgeous..."
Firm hands were running through Doyle's hair, sending prickles of pleasure up and down his spine.
"Take your shirt off...want to kiss all that hair underneath," Bodie was whispering, pulling impotently at Doyle's shirt.
Doyle was suddenly feeling very weary and would have liked to have curled up and gone to sleep, but he felt so warm and safe and wanted with Bodie, and was so eager to show him all the tenderness he felt for him that he'd never shown before, that he fought against the sleepiness. His shirt had somehow followed Bodie's jacket to the floor and he could feel Bodie running lazy circling fingertips over his chest, pausing every now and then to rub his nose softly against his nipples with a long sigh of pleasure. Then a hot, wet mouth and tongue replaced the hands, sucking him, and placing featherlight licks and kisses all over his chest, from his shoulders to his waist.
"...knew it'd be this good..." Bodie was whispering, sliding him full length along the sofa, "Oh, Ray..."
The warning bell rang again in Doyle's befuddled mind...loudly this time, even as he felt himself drowning in the sweet, sensual pleasure of Bodie's gentle tongue and hands, and the soft, teasing brush of his silky hair on his chest. He knew that, unlike Bodie, he was now much less drunk than when they'd arrived, and that an awkward, painful erection was already straining insistently at his pants. He was afraid, not for himself, but for Bodie...for the effect this uncharacteristic and unexpected lowering of barriers might have on Bodie. He was such a strange and sensitive creature, was Bodie, underneath all the devil-may-care smoothness, and he had to be protected from anything that might hurt him or make him unhappy...and if he remembered any of this in the morning...well, it'd be enough to make him withdraw completely...enough to risk the friendship Doyle held so dear.
But, oh Christ...I want it so...he thought desperately, as Bodie's tongue continued to tease him...I've never wanted anything so much in the whole of my life. Have I always wanted it and not realised it? Why have I never felt this good with a woman? Because I'm drunk and the inhibitions are gone? Or because it's so incredible to actually have him like this with me? So sweet...and tender and loving...
Being honest with himself, he admitted it couldn't be the drink. He'd had too much to drink too many times when he'd been out with girls, and found himself embarrassingly incapable...
He moaned as Bodie's tongue licked an erotic trail of fire down his body, following the hair line from his throat to his navel...God, if he'd only open my pants...stroke me...love me...make me come...Christ, I'll die if he doesn't...die if he does...doesn't matter either way...God knows what kind of climax I'd have with him, if he can make me feel like this without even touching me...
He was brought back to reality by the realisation that Bodie had stopped caressing him and was kneeling on the floor by the sofa, looking down at him, breathing heavily, with an incredulous, bemused expression on his face.
"Think you want me, Ray..." Bodie slurred, still drunk, amazement in his voice, "don't think I believe it..."
"You'd better, sunshine," Doyle assured him shakily, looking down at himself, "it's all for you." Bodie's hair was ruffled, his eyes soft and dark with desire, and his still half-disbelieving expression was so appealing that Doyle sat up quickly, ignoring the pain at the back of his head as he did so, and pulled Bodie back onto the sofa, settling them side by side. He slid his arms round Bodie's waist, sitting close, so their faces were only inches apart, long fingers tracing each feature with something akin to wonderment on his face at the expression in Bodie's eyes, skimming over eyelids and long, silky lashes, down the small, wide nose and mouth, firm chin and jawline...
"You're beautiful, you know," he said, kissing him softly.
"So're you..." Bodie whispered, "...offense to look like you...so cute..." He paused, frowning, trying to find the right words, "...tough little street urchin...elf from the wrong side of the tracks..."
"Very poetic, considerin' you're drunk, mate," Doyle chuckled, but his face suddenly became serious again as he took in the longing on Bodie's face, and he slowly came down to earth, making the decision he knew had to be made.
"Had a lot to drink," he said, his hand stroking Bodie's ruffled hair back into place, "you know that, don't you?"
"Yeah," Bodie slurred happily, "seem to remember a few bottles of wine somewhere along the way..."
"Yeah," Doyle agreed, as if talking to a wayward child, "and you may not realise it yet, sunshine, but you're gonna hate me in the morning."
"Nah...love you, don't hate you," Bodie protested in a friendly enough way, snuggling against him again, "only ever loved you, Ray. No one else..."
"Oh, Bodie..." Doyle whispered, "why have you never said that to me when you've been sober...you crazy..." His voice trailed away. He tightened his hold on Bodie, rocking him in his arms.
"You gonna sleep now?" he asked softly, after a moment or two.
"Not gonna kiss me anymore, huh?" Bodie said sleepily. He yawned loudly.
"No, not tonight," Doyle said, smiling, stroking his hair, "tomorrow, OK? When we're not drunk anymore...be better then..."
But Bodie was already asleep, his body suddenly heavy and slack against Doyle. The sofa wasn't the most satisfactory place to sleep, but Doyle couldn't have moved now if his life depended on it, and he couldn't bear the thought of disturbing Bodie. He settled Bodie's head more comfortably on his shoulder and closed his own eyes...
He awoke with a splitting head, a furred tongue and a painful crick in his neck, to find that Bodie hadn't moved, but was still deeply asleep, snoring against him gently.
Dead to the world, Doyle thought, as he extricated himself with great difficulty and Bodie didn't so much as bat an eyelid...be asleep for hours yet...
But he was wrong. Half an hour later, after he'd showered and dressed, taken two headache pills, and was in the process of making coffee, Bodie's bleary-eyed face appeared round the kitchen door, hand holding his forehead gingerly, grimacing. He looked exactly as he had the previous night...shirt tails hanging out of his trousers, hair standing on end...
Even so, he still looked gorgeous to Doyle, and his stomach turned a painful somersault in a combination of fear, anticipation and shocked longing.
"Christ almighty, Ray..." Bodie said huskily, without a trace of selfconsciousness, "how much did we have to drink last night? Haven't felt this bad since I was in my teens."
"Quite a lot," Doyle said, going back to spooning coffee into his cup, bending his head to hide the embarrassment he couldn't control.
Bodie picked up the corner of his shirt between finger and thumb and looked down at it. "Didn't know you went in for rape," he said conversationally, "either that, or I must have been having a wild fight with someone in my sleep."
Doyle's first instinct was to disbelieve him. It was impossible he didn't remember anything at all. Then he forced himself to look up, schooling his face to neutrality before he did so, and met Bodie's wide-eyed, completely innocent, if slightly teasing gaze.
"Yeah, I had my wicked way with you on the couch," he said as lightly as he could, "very nice it was, too."
"Always knew you were a sex maniac," Bodie said offhandedly, yawning. "Christ, my head. What happened to the girls?"
"Oh, we left them behind when I decided to have my wicked way with you," Doyle said in the same vein, as he sat down at the table with his coffee cup, an unbearable feeling of loss sweeping over him...a longing for what might have been, and what might now never be. He was suddenly angry with himself for not following his instincts and allowing it to happen last night. God, Bodie had been his for the taking, and he'd wanted him so much...He swallowed hard. He knew he'd never have another chance...Bodie'd never be quite like that with him again...
But he didn't know that, as ever when he was upset, his face reflected exactly what he was feeling, and that the sadness and longing showed all too clearly in his eyes. He bent his head, feeling almost like crying, wanting that tender, loving Bodie back again so much, it was like a hard physical ache inside.
He was so preoccupied he nearly missed Bodie's next words.
"Oh, yeah, I remember now," Bodie was saying softly, a new note of intimacy in his voice, "that must have been when you asked me how Helen kissed and I showed you..."
Doyle kept his head down, colour rising, as much in anger as embarrassment, even though he could feel the bubble of laughter starting in his throat. Christ, he should have known with Bodie! He'd been had...
"You scheming, lying..." he began, shoulders shaking with suppressed laughter, unable to hide it any longer.
Bodie grabbed hold of him, swinging him out of the chair, almost lifting him off his feet, sweeping him into a tight bearhug. He was laughing helplessly. "Oh, Ray...you should have seen your face," he said between smothered bursts of laughter, "all sorrowful and hurt..." choking as he fought for breath.
"I'll get you for this, Bodie..." Doyle threatened, "just you wait..." The feel of the solid body against his was almost too much to take. He knew he was trembling like a leaf, then realised Bodie was trembling too, and didn't mind so much...
"That sounds promising," Bodie said invitingly, lips grazing his cheek. "Do I get a kiss first?"
"Anything you want, mate, anything at all," Doyle said, eyes filling with tears as he saw that look of tenderness back in Bodie's eyes.
"Hey, come on," Bodie said very softly, "stop it, Ray...or I won't let you have your wicked way with me after all...don't want you crying all over me."
Doyle smiled, brushing away the tears. "Just tell me one thing," he said more warily, sniffing as he collected himself, "did you know what you were doing last night? Or were you really as drunk as you seemed?"
Bodie's face was suddenly serious. "No," he said, taking a deep breath, "I only knew I wanted to be close to you. No scheming, mate. Not last night. That was honest to God Bodie...for what it's worth."
"So is this now," Doyle said, amazed, running his hand over Bodie's cheek, "and in case you're interested, it's worth a lot." He had the satisfaction of seeing a faint flush tinge Bodie's cheeks.
"I seem to recall you were saying something about having your wicked way with me," Bodie prompted, hands running down Doyle's back, cupping the firm buttocks, drawing him closer. Doyle gasped as Bodie's hardness met his own.
"Was I?" he asked, deliberately vague.
"Is it what you want?" Bodie asked, with uncharacteristic hesitancy.
"Everything I want, and more."
"Oh, well, in that case," Bodie said in his sexiest voice, "and as I seem to have already bared my soul to you in my drunken state, I suppose it's no good pretending anymore..." kissing him again, "by the way, exactly what did I say last night?"
"Ahha, that's be telling..." Doyle said knowingly, sliding out of his grasp and backing away.
"Oh, no, you don't," Bodie warned, in pursuit, as Doyle headed in the direction of the bedroom, "Ray...you're in for it now, sunshine...just wait till I get my hands on you..." as the bedroom door slammed shut behind them...
-- THE END --