Raymond and Bodie were lovers,
Oh Lordy how they did love!
Swore to be true to each other
Just like the stars above.
He was Ray's man, but he was doing him wrong.

Raymond went down to the library,
Flashed his ID with a sneer,
Asked of the busy librarian
"Has that bastard Bodie been here?
"He is my man, think he's doin' me wrong."

"Ain't gonna tell you no stories,
"Somebody else has got hair,
"Bodie took a book just an hour ago
"With a cute little guy called Blair;
"Your Bodie-man must be doin' you wrong!"

Raymond went over to Bodie's,
Pulled out his big forty-four,
Was all set to shoot, rooty-toot-toot,
When a voice sounded through the door:
"Ray's my man, and I won't do him wrong."

"Surely am happy to to hear that,"
Said this big fellow called Jim,
"Sorry to sneak up behind you
"But Blair's fate was looking grim!
"He is my man, wouldn't do me wrong."

Bodie and Blair were embarrassed,
Blushed as they came into sight,
Caught with a gaysex manual,
Reading how to do their lovers right:
Tired of hearing: "You're doin' me wrong."


December 1998