The Professionals Circuit Archive - Can You Handle It?       Can You
Handle It?

 

by S 

 
 *Takes place after "The Purging of CI5"*


 It wasn't often that CI5 remembered three of its own on the same day.
Cowley had received permission from the relatives of his three fallen men
to hold a memorial service before the bodies of Williams, Matheson and
King were taken away for private burial. Cowley had spoken of all three
men, but had also allowed Lake to eulogise his partner. In a choked voice
Lake had spoken of the time he had first met Williams, their closeness as
partners and even one slightly risque story about Williams and a bird.

 It was during the telling of that story that Bodie had looked over at the
woman Williams had been seeing at the time of his death. She had tears
running down her face, but she was smiling. At the end of his
remembrances, Lake had winked at the woman, sharing a link that no one but
someone who loved Williams could understand.

 On the other side of the aisle the parents of Matheson and King sat
solemnly. They had appreciated the comforting words given by the
Controller. The fact that their sons had died in the service of their
country had helped their grief, despite the brutal knowledge that the
madness of two individuals had truly been the reason for the tragedy.
Unfortunately, neither set of parents would acknowledge the other. Their
sons had been lovers, but all four individuals preferred to forget that
part of their relationship. Matheson and King had been partners--only
partners and would be buried miles from each other.

 As the service came to an end, most of the agents started towards their
motors after shaking hands with the grieving family members. A select few
were to head back to headquarters on standby in case of an emergency;
however, most of the senior agents were planning to stop by the CI5 local.
It had been Lake's idea for a farewell to the three men. He'd already
cleared it with Cowley who had agreed. The Controller himself had even
promised to attend for a short while if possible.

 "You ready to go, mate?" Bodie looked over at his partner who looked pale
and uncomfortable in the new black suit he'd purchased just the day
before.

 Doyle nodded. "Said we'd give Susie a ride, if 's all right with you?"

 "Sure. Thought she was going with Billy?"

 "Billy ran out while Cowley was talkin'. Don't think he's come to grips
with his part in their deaths yet," Ray sighed.

 "Yeh, little wally did seem to take it hard," Bodie acknowledged. "Least
he didn't end up like Chris."

 Doyle looked hard at his friend, who was dressed in a dark blue suit with
slightly lighter blue shirt and tie. "Guess we did one thing right then."
Hesitating, he brightened when he saw Susan approaching. "C'mon, I need a
drink."

 With Susan in the passenger seat and Doyle in the back, Bodie drove the
Silver Capri efficiently and quickly to the local. Many of the agents were
already there ahead of them with full glasses.

 Grabbing a table, Bodie sat down with Susan while Doyle picked up their
drinks from the bar. Making his way back to the table, Doyle nearly ran
into George Cowley, who was standing with Phillips and Lake. Lake still
looked ashen, but was making an effort to be pleasant.

 For a time the noise level was at a minimum, but as healthy bodies
adjusted to liquor and the guilty pleasure of survival, their voices rose
until it was almost impossible for anyone to carry on a normal
conversation.

 Doyle didn't even try. He was content to drink, letting Bodie flirt with
Susan Fischer to his heart's content. He knew that Bodie had asked the
blonde agent out several times, but had always been turned down. Still, he
understood that Bodie was not a quitter. Had he not shouted his warning
while in the caravan, CI5 would have lost six men, including George
Cowley.

 It was at that moment that the Scotsman appeared at their table, scotch
in hand. "I will be leaving in a moment or two." Glancing around, he
frowned. "I do not intend to end up like you, 4.5 and 3.7, with your
recent loss of hearing. I just wanted you to know that you have two days
off. You too, 5.8."

 "Thank you, sir." Susan Fischer was a well-brought up young woman.

 "Ta," Bodie added while Doyle just nodded.

 "Your flats have all been cleared by Phillips' men so you can get some
rest. I highly recommend that you do, but I'm sure you'll make your own
decisions. Staring straight at Bodie, he added, "You always do."

 "That's good news, sir. I just hope that Phillips' men didn't tear up
things too much," Susan commented.

 "I'm sure they were as careful as if they were carrying a case of pure
malt scotch, Miss Fischer."

 Susan smiled at the older man. "I'm sure. Oh, by the way, sir, would you
be able to take me back to headquarters? I left my car there."

 "Of course. Finish your drink and we'll go."

 Susan tossed back the rest of her white wine then stood up to face Bodie
and Doyle. "Thanks for the ride. See you in a couple of days!"

 Bodie just sat there, not knowing what to say.

 "F-Fancy 'nother round, m-mate?" Doyle's eyes struggled to focus.

 "Nah, let's get out of here." Jumping to his feet, Bodie grabbed Doyle by
the arm to help him rise, inadvertently spilling the last of Doyle's
drink. 4.5 didn't seem to notice as he diligently tried to put one foot in
front of the other.

 As soon as they were inside the Capri, Ray tilted his head back and went
to sleep.

 Throwing the car into gear, Bodie headed towards his own flat. He had two
days off and he intended to enjoy them.

 ******

Pulling up at the kerb, Bodie nudged his partner. "We're here. Up and at
'em, tiger."

 Doyle grumbled and then opened his eyes. "'m home?"

 "We're at my place. Thought you might come in for awhile," Bodie
announced.

 "No p-point. Can't do anything." Doyle rubbed roughly at his groin. "See,
n-nothin'."

 "I'll make some coffee," 3.7 offered.

 "Okay. Can't h-hurt to t-try." Doyle staggered out of the car with Bodie
trailing along behind until they were both inside the flat.

 Doyle flopped on the couch whilst Bodie made the coffee. By the time the
ex-merc was there with two mugs and a bottle of milk, Ray had already
removed his tie, jacket and had the sleeves of his shirt shoved up to his
elbows.

 "'S hot in here."

 "It'll be better soon. Drink this." Bodie handed over one of the mugs.

 Doyle did as ordered, burning his tongue on the hot brew. After several
sips, he looked up at Bodie. "Somethin' the matter?"

 "You downed three doubles in less than an hour. 's not like you to be
legless in the middle of the day."

 "'m not legless. Just m-mellow. 'Sides today's not like any other d-day,
is it?" Doyle drank some more coffee.

 "I guess you're right. Three dead CI5 agents. Could have been more too."

 "Yeh, you for instance," the green-eyed man accused. "If you hadn't seen
that piece of wire...." Doyle's slim body shuddered.

 "But I did 'n you handled it perfectly." Bodie patted him on the knee.

 "Why'd you call me on the R/T, 'n not Phillips?"

 Bodie sat there, puzzled. "Dunno. You were closer I guess. Knew you could
take care of it."

 "No other reason?"

 "What are you tryin' to say, Ray? You think I wanted to put you in
jeopardy too?"

 Ray stood up, swaying only slightly. "Dunno what to think anymore. I was
fine whilst we workin' on the case, but now 'm havin' dreams. Can't handle
'em or losin' you."

 "'S that why you haven't wanted to stay over with me?" Up until the
Wakeman/Catrell case the two lovers had spent most nights at one flat or
the other.

 "Partly. I keep seeing you there at the desk, but instead of waiting for
me to disarm the bomb, you let loose of the dial. You...you're just gone
and I'm left standin' there on my own. Scares me to death it does. I wake
up shiverin'." Doyle admitted.

 Bodie moved to take Doyle into his arms. "Do you really think I want to
leave you?" He whispered into Ray's ear.

 Doyle's head rested against Bodie's chest. Just listening to that
reassuring heartbeat made him feel happier. "Don't want to think so. 'd
prefer to think you wanted me in there so if something went wrong, we'd go
together. Just like in the car outside Billy's place. When you said,
'Stick it in!' me cock jerked with lust 'n happiness knowin' you wouldn't
leave me."

 Bodie caressed his lover's cheekbone with his thumb. "Sometimes you're
daft, sunshine. Do you think I could stand across the street and watch you
take all the chances? First and last, I'm your partner. Bein' your lover
is just the icin' on the Swiss roll."

 Ray chuckled when he heard that. "Knew you'd find some way to bring food
into it." Then he sobered. "'s just that I've been thinkin' 'bout Matheson
and King. Didya see how their families were? Couldn't even admit that the
two of them loved each other."

 Bodie ruffled Ray's auburn curls. "Don't have to worry about that, do we?
Neither of us have families to worry about."

 "No, but you still have Joanna and the other birds you date."

 Bodie's sapphire eyes narrowed. "'m not the only one who dates. We agreed
that it was necessary for both of us to keep seein' women from time to
time."

 "I know, but I just keep seein' me at your memorial service and a bevy of
birds are sittin' there cryin' whilst I have to pretend we were just
friends."

 Bodie could hear the fear in this lover's voice. Rubbing Ray's back
gently, he let touch speak for him.

 Doyle responded. He needed his lover's comfort. He knew there was no
solution unless both men chose to leave CI5 and that wasn't an option at
that moment. "Sorry, 'm such a gloomy Gus. Tried not to think about losin'
you 'n then I heard all them lovely words the Cow was talking. All he'd
have to do is change the names 'n he could be talkin' 'bout you 'n me."

 "Do you think I haven't thought about that? When we went to bed the first
time, I knew it was going to change things between us. Tried to keep it
light, no commitment, but we've gone past that, sunshine," Bodie tried to
assure him.

 "So what are you sayin'? Can you handle it if I go first?"

 Bodie dropped his hands from Ray's shoulders. "Do we have to talk about
this now? We have two days off. I thought we could spend them in bed."

 "Just tell me you can handle it and I'll drop the subject. I need to
know."

 "I *can* handle it. Wouldn't be easy, but I'm a survivor. You know that.
Done more in my life than most people can imagine, but lovin' you has been
the best part of it."

 Ray took a deep breath. "'m glad. Feel the same way 'bout lovin' you."

 "So can we go to bed now?"

 "Lead the way. I've been thinkin' of something new to do."

 "New?"

 "C'mere, you'll like it. Been savin' it for a day off." Doyle grabbed
Bodie's unknotted tie, holding onto both ends with one hand while lithely
picking up his own from the couch "Let's go," he grinned evilly.

 Bodie trotted along. He wasn't sure what was going to happen; but as long
as he was with Ray Doyle, he knew he could handle it.

 -- THE END --

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